Day 1...When I Give I Feel Light

Day 1

The Gift: A ten pound bag of IAMS hairball formula cat food

I had known for a while that I wanted to give this bag of cat food away. I accidently bought it one day many months ago and after the first bowl realized that our two cats just didn’t care for it. Now I am a person who struggles to throw anything away, especially something I have just purchased so the bag of cat food has just been sitting around annoying me. I loaded it into my car and it sat there for weeks because I just didn’t ever get out to the shelter. I had lost touch with the times that our local shelter was open since it was run entirely by volunteers and there just never seemed like a convenient time to go. So on this, my first day of giving, I decided to just bite the bullet and drive the extra mile to go out to the shelter to see if it was open. As I approached the parking lot I noticed that my heart was beating loudly and I was a little nervous, questions were racing through my mind:

• What if there is no one there to accept my gift?
• What if this is not the type of cat food they feed their cats?
• What if this is not good enough?
• Will they tell me that my gift is no good, too old, not enough?
• What if they mock me and my gift?

While they may seem like pretty silly questions and concerns - they were all there and more -  I realized why I had not yet dropped off the cat food and was wondering if fulfilling my daily gift exercise should have been something more meaningful (or easier). But then, another question popped into my brain:

• If I don’t give this today, what is my alternative gift?

That was the question that turned the tide - I did not have a back-up plan yet so it had to be this. Relief flashed through me as I noticed that there were no cars in the parking lot - I was going to be taken off the hook and not have to face all of my underlying fears. But alas, in a shady corner near the front door was a little girl sitting cross-legged on a table with her bike balanced on the wall next to her. I got out with the big orange bag of cat food and asked her if she was waiting for a ride - again thinking that since they had just closed, I would have to do this another day and would get relief from my fears right now. She told me that she was waiting for them to open and since she rides her bike out to the shelter on the day she works she tends to be early, so she was just sitting in the shade - waiting.

I handed the girl the bag and asked her to give it to the Director when the shelter opened. She received my gift, smiled and said “okay, thank you”.  I walked away thinking about what the scene would look like when this little girl presented the Director with ten pounds of cat food. My first gift was to be received more than once. That little girl willingly, opening, gratefully, and thankfully accepted my gift and all of my concerns were abated. I felt light, happy and like I accomplished more than just giving away some old cat food. My first day of giving was a success.

❦ When I give, I feel light.